Your Soul’s Compass, What Is Spiritual Guidance? Part 5 Is It Guidance or Is It Me?

This is a question I get so much, as a coach. Am I hearing Guidance, or is it just my ego mind?

Joan and Gordon has put forth a very solid way of looking at discerning Guidance and Doubt.

They point out that “there is no recipe or formula that can indicate with absolute certainty if it’s God or Ego running the show. The proof is ultimately in the feedback.”

They recount Reb Zalman as sharing, “I must always have doubt where the guidance comes from. Doubt is not the enemy of faith. Doubt is the means by which we scrape off the barnacles from the ship of faith.”

So having doubt can be useful? I like the idea in the book that there are two faces to doubt; one positive or helpful, one negative or not helpful.

The Buddha is quoted as saying that the only way to determine true guidance is on the basis of your own personal experience (chalk one up for determining your own indicators and benchmarks in your self coaching process!)

“It’s a very rational point of view, being open to what’s true and what’s real. And so in that sense you question yourself. It’s a positive or constructive questioning because it’s in the service of knowing a greater truth, and it calls us to a deeper reflection”. Sufi guide, Taj Inayat, Your Soul’s Compass

The point is made that doubt can be an important ally when it opens us to deeper levels of experience and reflection. But the doubt that is negative, or a hindrance is the kind that slows or paralyzes our actions.

So one kind of doubt initiates inquiry, a deeper love for the truth and a greater connection to our true nature and guidance from the Source. While the other kind of doubt brings anxiety, ego chatter and blocks us to hearing or acting on true guidance.

I’ve always liked to say that if the guidance has the voice of love you can trust it, with the caveat to check in with the rational mind for ways to blend the guidance with linear time/space requirements, and the body to get input about physical needs.

And if the voice comes from fear, and you feel your energy dropping, feel yourself losing momentum or falling into negative self-talk, then that is the Critic Mind, the Ego talking. No worries though. I use that as a type of guidance itself to move back into gentle inquiry for the love-heart truth to surface with true guidance.

I hope this series accompanied by the wonderful book Your Soul’s Compass by Joan Boysenko and Gordon Dveirin has been nourishing for you. They have some wonderful additional thoughts on supporting yourself and supporting others as you expand.

You all might know my personal idea, that each journey is an individual journey as we have the privilege to exercise preference. So if you are called to this book, I recommend it as a support on your own journey. And count me as a friend and co-traveler along the way, as well.

To the journey!

Deborah

P.S. Don’t miss our next book, The Intuitive Way. I have a few more companions to join us in our study of Intuition, some wonderful information out there. You can sign up to be notified of our next book discussion or connect with me on one of the social media sites.

Your Soul’s Compass, What Is Spiritual Guidance? Part 4 Into Me See

“Receiving Guidance, and then acting on it, requires a balance of the head and heart,” state Joan Borysenko and Gordon Dveirin in their chapter titled “Intimacy, Seeing With the Eyes of the Heart.”

In this chapter they very clearly outline the role of the wisdom of the heart in receiving guidance, and how that knowing that comes from the heart’s wisdom differs from the emotions felt. I like what was said about information that feels less intense than normal emotions, that seems to come from a broader perspective, less from personality and more from the soul.

And I’m wondering about others everyday experiences with the heart’s wisdom. More specifically, I’d love to hear experiences of how the heart’s wisdom, which the authors explain as non-rational, non-verbal even, and faster than the rational mind, can be used with, not opposed to the rational mind.

Shall I go first? Occasionally, as a parent, I’ve found myself in uncharted territory, especially when something or someone is troubling one of my children. I remember a specific incident when I arrived at my daughter’s school to find she was sitting with several other children in the administrator’s office. I was told that they had been throwing rocks down the hill behind the school, onto the neighbor’s roof.

It was my heart, the strong steady guidance of my heart, that came to me with a knowing that this was a very important moment in the development of my relationship with my daughter and her relationship with herself. Thank goodness I listened to my heart.

Because instead of trying to force, fix, or do anything from fear of how others saw me as a parent, I simply focused on what would be the most caring action in that moment. Once my heart was “driving the vehicle” my mind helped me with the details. I assured my daughter it would all be OK, we’d work everything out. We went home and I got her some dinner and a bath. And after comfy jammies and hot chocolate, only then did we timeline the details of the day, the situation, and it’s aftermath. It was an easy stretch to find the learning in the situation and the correct actions to make amends.

To this day my daughter remembers this event, not in an “that was one of the worst days of my life”, but in “I’ll always remember how you didn’t get mad so I knew it was going to be OK” way. And she remembers me as loving, supportive, and comforting. She can also remember what she learned, “that when someone in your group tells you “let’s throw rocks, you go first”, maybe wait and think things through.

So, following the guidance of my heart, and using my mind to work with my heart, certainly led to a greater closeness with my daughter, but more importantly, my daughter didn’t start a pattern of feeling bad about herself that day. And I’ll bet the next time someone says “you go first”, she’ll pause and think about the situation more carefully. So yes, I’m very glad for the wisdom of my heart.

I’d love to hear any stories or situations you’ve experienced where your heart’s wisdom was heard and acted upon. By sharing, we strengthen our results and those of others.

This chapter, as if by magic offered a foreshadowing of our next months study when it quoted Reb Zalman Schachter-Shalomi:

“In the world of intuition, it doesn’t come in words…”

And Reb Zalmans’ good friend Father Thomas Keeting says:

“this knowing, this subtler quality grows out of the sincerity of one’s practice and the depth of one’s opening to this relationship to God”

A great lead-in as we start our discussion of Intuition next week with The Intuitive Way, by Penney Peirce.

Donna Seebo, author of Mind Magic, will be my guest again on Day-By-Day Radio to answer your questions about Intuition and give live intuitive readings.

Get on the RSS feed so you don’t miss any of our entries exploring Guidance, Intuition, and how to use these to enhance your everyday life.

Wishing you a Happy Fall,

Deborah

Your Soul’s Compass, What Is Spiritual Guidance? By Joan Borysenko, Ph.D and Gordon Deverin, Ed.D. – Part 2

I love the metaphor for guidance as a compass, something that can keep us on the path of True North, or as the authors say, “wisdom, God, or Ultimate Reality”. They liken the heart to the center of the compass, with the needle giving us guidance (through the emotions) back to our “True North”.

Just for fun, to live with the idea of this book, I’m attaching a small compass to my sleeve each morning and then checking in throughout the day to what direction I’m pointing. Then, from that awareness, of where I’m pointing in physical space, I’m checking in with where I’m at in my emotional space.

Want to join me? I’d love to hear thoughts, wonders, revelations.

Meet you heading True North.

Deborah

Your Soul’s Compass, What Is Spiritual Guidance? By Joan Borysenko, Ph.D and Gordon Deverin, Ed.D. – Part 3

“Everything Provides Guidance”; this is a subheading in the second chapter of the book. That pretty much sums up my idea about Guidance, as well.

The authors continue their discuss with some examples of “everything”; from the Felt Sense, to Signs and Synchronicities, Listening for Guidance, Intuition, and Dreams. We’ll be talking more on the blog about Intuition, and on Day By Day Radio, with Donna Seebo, as well (listen to her interview).

One of the things I was thinking about as I read this chapter was how every situation, and I usually noticed the more intense situations more, that I either liked or really didn’t like, had a wealth of information and guidance for me. But sadly, I often only realized that guidance in hindsight.

I remember once, being more and more uncomfortable in a summer job I accepted. I had a dream one night in which it was as if I wore a large floppy hat that obscured my view except from below my nose. So I couldn’t see clearly where I was, or where I was going. I kept bumping into things in the dream.

It was only after I left the job and felt the huge relief from my decision that I remembered the dream again. In hindsight, I could see how I felt, after leaving like I was removing what obscured my vision and allowed me to see my path again. And there was huge relief in that.

But I don’t have to chase sleep to receive Guidance. I learned how to learn what my indicators were that I was receiving Guidance, and not just various thoughts, “shoulds”, and “better not or you’ll…”.

I now teach an updated and expanded version of that same course. And I’ll be saying more about that as the weeks go on.

But for now, if you’re interested in learning how to decipher your own Guidance signals, I’ll share with you where I started.

I started by recounting memories, such as the dream above, when looking back I could see that I was receiving useful information, information that could be seen as helpful, supportive, affirming, and possibly even suggesting a change in course of action.

Then I began to think, make a few notes, about what accompanied that information. Perhaps it felt a certain way. Maybe certain thoughts always accompanied the information. Or maybe I felt the information in a certain place in my body?

I began to see that when helpful information bubbled up inside of me, seemed to come from out of nowhere, there were certain thoughts, sensations, directions and feelings that accompanied that information.

Likewise, when it was just my busy, monkey-mind messing with me, trying to throw me off track from a big change, that too was accompanies by a particular brand of thoughts, sensations, directions and feelings.

Maybe this will help you begin to play detective, scientist, and strategist for your own Guidance. And let me know here, what you discover. Sharing benefits us all.

Next time I want to talk a bit about Chapter 4, Intimacy…Seeing With The Eyes of the Heart.

Your Soul’s Compass, What Is Spiritual Guidance? By Joan Borysenko, Ph.D and Gordon Deverin, Ed.D.

First Post, Beginning Our Journey. I’m so excited to begin this journey with you all, starting with the study of this book, Your Soul’s Compass.

Joan Borysenko, PhD, is well known for her books and teaching on the mind/body connection, stress relief and healing. Gordon Dveirin, Joan’s husband, is president of his own consulting firm for the field of human development (e.g. how to accomplish more with what you have).

So come join me as I dive right in to this book and pull out all the juicy wisdom from two people who’ve seen much from people who are “on track” and people who are not.

Here’s how they get us going…

“If there is such a thing as spiritual guidance that directs us to our best self individually and collectively, following that guidance involves some serious questions:

How do we tell the difference between spiritual guidance and the ego’s need for control, certainty, and power–or from instinctive drive and social conditioning?

Is there a divine attraction–a kind of grace that pulls us forward on the journey of becoming an awake, compassionate, and purposeful human being…or are we the sole instigators of that quest?

And perhaps most important, is there a compass of love and wisdom, within the soul that keeps us on track–and if so, how does it function”?
Your Soul’s Compass, page xii

Don’t you just love that? I have another question to add, if I might:

How can I use that compass, right now, with what’s going on for me?

Ahhh. So come explore the book, the questions and the answers with me. I look forward to your thoughts and comments. D.

For more reviews and discussions on this book click here